"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

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what did the kid say when he didnt see the ice and sliped and broke his arm ouch that beep hurt

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What did Shaggy say to Scooby before they got in the Mystery Machine? Scooby, get in the Mystery Machine.

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Yo momma so stupid she tried drowning a gold fish. She got accused for animal cruelty.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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you know whats worse than cantaloupe? no cantaloupe

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What do an airplane and a strawberry have in common? They can both fly.... Except for the strawberry

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Why did the deaf man attend the music concert? He was invited by friends and wasn't doing anyhting else that evening.

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What do you call a black man that likes potatoes? Whatever his name is.

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So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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What do you get when you cross Jesus with James Woods? Crucifixion

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don't do anything i wouldn't do first

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What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

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Why did the 3 legged dog fall over? Because it was knocked over by a passing pedestrian.

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? Can I have fries with that?

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is actually a really good question which leads me to wonder why the farmer let the chicken out in the first place.

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Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 and 7 are non-living objects and cannot show fear or anger.

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What did the alchoholic get for his birthday? Nothing. His alchohol abuse split up is family and now he is alone.

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Why did the clam not like to share? The deep sea is a competitive environment, where survival of the fittest is prominent.

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You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like your mom Give me some glue

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u suck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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