A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

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A homosexual and a heterosexual bump into each other on the street. But its okay, because although they both lead very different lifestyles, they are open minded enough to respect each others choices and both apologize and keep walking.

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Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

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You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

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Where was the black child's dad? At work. He'll be back around 6:30

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Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

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Why didn't the man laugh at his son's joke? Because he was born without a mouth.

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Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

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The stone said to tree I wanna be car the tree replied you cant be a car. Forever a stone

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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How do you tell if an albino baby is black? Check his genetics.

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What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

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Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

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Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

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Whats fluffy, multicolored, and dances like a disco santaclaus? i don't know.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

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Why was the black man very rich? Because he was a lawyer who worked hard and was able to provide himself with a steady income.

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why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

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Dave: Knock, knock Steven: Come in.

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Your mother is so stupid because as a child, she was unable to keep up with what was being taught as she unfortunately had a learning disability.

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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