A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock? Who's there? Not Mary.

A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

Hey man. what? squidbillies.

why does horse head huffer keep posting here? because he really doesn't understand the concept.

What are annoying? Ads.

What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

Roses are red, violets are red. Aaaaaahh! My garden's on fire!

What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

How many mathematicians does it take to count?

There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a well respected member of the community.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy! But here's my switchblade Get in the trunk.

What sport do all black people like? This is impossible to answer because not all black people like the same sport.

womens rights.

How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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