Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? names.....

Why is the black man in the ghetto? He is a cop and is trying to solve a murder that was committed a couple days ago.

A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

what happened to the asian who failed his math quiz... his parents killed him

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff. What's not pink and fluffy? Rape.

why do black people hate whites? their is no light in the ghetto

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? i don't know, he hasn't unwrapped it yet

Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? Their skin color.

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

I'm homeless.

What do Robbers Get for Christmas? Other peoples things.

wanna hear a joke? womans rights

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

Why was billy sad because in the morning he witnessed his mom get stabbed in the throat repeatedly by a clown then he saw the clown in the cop car but his mask was off and it turned out to be billys dad

Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

A giant storm loomed over a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who has been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? No one knows.

What do you do if there's a black guy bleeding on your lawn? Help Him

why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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