Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

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why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

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Why did the Chinese Arab buy blue paint? He already had red in his basement.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your pork? Finding half of a worm, because the worm you just ate is going to live in your stomach, breed, then come out your butt. Or the Apocalypse.

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three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

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Q: What does Chinese look like? A:Chinese

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So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

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Hey i just met you. and this is crazy. I sent you my pubes in an envelope.

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

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Did you hear about the kidnapping? Well you should be very concerned because he hasn't been found in 4 years.

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I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

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Knock knock Whos there Your Ma Your Ma who Your ma's in jail!!!

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A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What did the bartender say when the black man walked into the bar? Hello, what would you like to drink?

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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what is brown and wet? Muddy water

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How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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