why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

What do Wal-Mart and Michael Jackson have in common? They both have made a lot of money and are also well known around the world.

Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

A black man, a white man and a Mexican walk into a bar. They have a beer, enjoy some pleasant conversation, then go home to their families.

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

What is the difference between a black man and a potato? Well, there are a great many differences. But the main one is probably that a potato is a potato, and a black man is a black man.

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

What did the prostitute say to the pimp? Can I have $50? She was found three minutes later beaten to death with a purple cane, and had many imprssions of rings in her skull

Knock knock. Who's there?

mark is religion

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Once upon a time there was a chicken...the chicken married a dog. They dog and the chicken had little baby dog-chickens then the daddy dog killed the mummy chicken by eating her. The baby doggie-chicks saw and tried to run away but the daddy dog ate them too. Moral of the story: Marry someone who can't eat you ;)

Guy 1: why are you being such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most pussy

4/20 is a holiday just like Christmas.. I lied you just get baked

Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

Hi i want a cheeseburger and a small fry, said bob. And then, said the guy taking the order. thats all, said bob. And then, said the guy. Ummmm ok well i take small coke, said bob. And then, said that guy. Thats all, said bob. and then, said the guy. whatever i'll take a milkshake, said bob. And then, said that guy. and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then

I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

What is a white man in a white shirt called A white man in a white shirt

Roses are red Violets are blue I have five fingers The third one's for you

Why did the black man commit suicide? Because the white man murdered him.

when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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