If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

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How do you make a Chef cry? You kill his family.

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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A horse walks into a bar the bartender says to the horse y the long face the horse is unable to speak English, shits on the floor than leaves.

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why is pie good. because it just is.

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How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

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how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

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Every day thousands of pets and animals are beaten, neglected and abused.

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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What did the black jewish homosexual say to the conquistador? Nothing as they were both from entirely different time periods.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

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Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

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What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

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I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

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What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

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whats the king of the forest, is the color brown and is red all over? A deer or someone's soon to be dinner.

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Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops