What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

Two muffins were in an oven. One of them said, "It's sure hot in here!" The other muffin didn't respond because it's dead.

Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill all his friends and family.

A kangaroo walks into a bar and says "Lipstick is the blood of all wounds." The bartender does not know how the kangaroo said this or why.

whats funny about anti jokes? nothing hince the name ANTI.

What do you call a Black Man in the ocean? A scuba diver

how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

Knock Knock! Who's there? John.

Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

your momma is so fat that she should be worried about her higher risk of heart disease, diabetes, and ugliness.

Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

TOP COMMENT IS MINE!

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

Pull my finger ouch..

Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

I saw a woman get burned alive on the news... That woman was my mom.

"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

Man: Doctor, everything I touch hurts. Doctor: Okay. Let's test it out by first touching your leg. Man: It hurts. Doctor: What about your arm? Man: It hurts as much. Doctor: What about your back? Man: It still hurts. Doctor: I see......your fingers are broken.

There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

What's a fun thing to do on a plane? Make a bolt to the pilot, smash his brains in with a iron pipe and make the plane plummet a few hundred feet with a maniacal laugh until you wake up from your dream and scream at your mother to wipe you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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