How do you start a fire in the woods? Call Cole Ryder!

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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What's worse than 13 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 13 trees...

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Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

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Do you know what the zombie said? Raaargh Brains

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what do you call a a miget crossed with a vampire? A miget, vampires are a figment of you're screwed up imagination.

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Nero I know I am being a selffish bastard, but please let me speak with you for ten more minutes or so, I am sorry but its like part of me do not believe its you, we all saw your corpse, attended your funeral, please stick with me, I just feel flustered vulnerable and stupid.

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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A police officer asks a witness of a murder what he witnessed. The man replies "A murder"

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Bacon is delcious.

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yo mama is so dumb, she got all Fs on her report

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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Your mom is so fat when she sat on wallmart she lowered the prices

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What is 1+4x : No i will not take my pants off!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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how do you kill a giraffe? you don't.

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Roses are red violets are blue your mother is pretty what happened to you.

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What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

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how come timmy didnt brush his teeth he didnt have a toothbrush

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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