What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

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The body system was looking for a leader!? Heart - I am because I circulate the blood Brain - I should be because I control the body Liver - I should because I feed Anus - No, I am All laugh The anus held closed for seven days. The liver exploded the brain stewed and the heart stopped beating. Anus - Now, what am I?!

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Has u seen my grammar?

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Jesse is so fat that Roy is jealous of his big ass tits

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Lil Wayne's rapping career

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Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

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It's so hot even chuck noris can't withstand this shit.

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, here's some candy, gent in the van.

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Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

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What's white, wet, and sticky? A tissue that I just blew my nose with.

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whats white and pointless? chalk.

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What do you call a gay couple with jobs and a kid?? Responsible.

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What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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Why are some people so awesome? Because their black.

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Where did the black man sleep? In his house with his wife and children.

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I used to take arrows to the knee but then I didn't, for no particular reason.

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why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuble prizes.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

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What's 50 feet tall, wears glasses and plays dungeons and dragons. A nerd, I lied about the 50 feet part.

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no

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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