Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

you lose.

How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

8===D ~ ~ ~

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

whats purple and has legs? Nothing, i lied about both

What do you call a muslim who is not a terrorist ? A muslim

What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

What do you do if you see a man on the street with a pineapple up his bum? Take him to the hospital to have the pineapple removed professionally. It could be potentially dangerous for his health.

how makes licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? depends on how determined you are to find out

What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

What's the difference between Micheal Jackson and a grocery bag? One carries groceries and the other molests children

A women frantically calls the doctor and says, " Doctor, doctor, give me the news! I have a bad case of loving you."

What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The third one is for you

There once was a man from Dundee. He got stung by an angry wasp. He put some Bactine on it. He lied down and took a rest He felt much better the next morning.

getting a call from the hospital saying that your whole entire family was all killed in an explosion and they were killed from your best friend.

What is big, grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

you know what ice cream's made out of, right? milk.

Why do Mexicans stink? Because they're Mexican.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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