A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

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Yo momma's so fat that all the children within a close proximity of your home think that your mother is a very large woman.

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why was the guy stranded on an island? because his boat crashed.

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Jimmy Saville

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If you rape a prostitute is it shop lifting?

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Q. what did the kid say to his foreign language teacher about the test? A: i dont understand this test, its like in a complete different language

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What is the best invention ever? Taking a crap reverse. So you can enjoy a nice bowl of aids.

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What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate black people, and mexicans too.

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Mary had a big white van, a big white van, a big white van, Mary had a big white van, where did my friend go? (sing the song)

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am a dog.

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Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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What's long and hard? The Ap European exam that i just took.

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how do you make your mom mad? mushroom stamp her face

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What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

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A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

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What did the Nazi put into the oven? Bread.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Who killed the ears of every human being? -Rebecca Black

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What did the farmer say when he lost his truck? Wheres my truck?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody cause your a loser.

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Why did the girl fall of her chair? The chair can only hold so much weight.

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Look how far I can kick this bucket

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops