Mark Wilson

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How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

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What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

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What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one is quite sure because technology is not advanced enough for humans to converse with chickens.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Type 2 diabetics

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

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Q: What is the meaning of life? A: We don't know. Dwight: FALSE. The answer to everything is 42.

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"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains." "Well that sounds like a mental illness and I deal predominantly with physical ailments"

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What happened when the teacher told the class to be quite? The class was quite.

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Oh, I must be hearing things.

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A Elephant was going to fight against the biggest and toughest and meanest giant African desert mouse! The battle the animal kingdom had waited for centuries! *DING!* Elephant: Get up Mickey! Mouse: Squish! Disney: How big do you really think a African "giant" desert mouse is?

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What does the young boy say to the gay man Hello Jacob, because he was raised to respect and treat gays equally

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What do you get if your mailman drops your letter in black paint? Blackmail

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What did the judge say to the midget when he sent him to jail ? Stop beating your wife

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A guy has cancer. He dies.

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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What's the difference between an elephant and a toaster. A lot of things.

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? playing spin the bottle with your mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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