What is red, and bucket shaped? A red bucket.

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Knock knock. Who is it? The police officer. ok, im not home.

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Cancer.

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so there are two muffins in an oven. one muffin says to the other muffin, "hey is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin says, "holy sh*t your a talking muffin."

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What do you call putting a vehicle on the side of the road? Parking.

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Why did Superman stop collecting stones? Did he ever? Moral: Yes but his kryptonite collection seemed to slow him down at times... until he stopped...

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Did you hear about the new pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

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Your social life.

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ask me if im a house are you a house? no

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What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

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Why do women have boobs? So they can feed their newborn children without paying for expensive formula

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Q. What happened when a mouse ran up the clock and it struck 12? A. It fell off and got raped by an 80 year old Asian lady with breast cancer

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What do you call a car with no wheels or engine? Immobile

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A blonde sits down in first class on a flight to Miami. That's because she had a ticket for the seat.

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A man walks into a bar with a sad-looking face. He orders a strong drink. The bartender asks him "What's wrong? You seem down." The man answers "Well, tough week. My wife was raped and murdered and my son was hit by a bus."

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Why did the Muslim enter the bar? He didn't.

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zebras

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who touched the priests sticky hand? Jake Duncan

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!" The other bar patrons ask him what is wrong, to which he replies, "I stubbed my toe."

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-How old are you, Dick? -I'm 30 centimeters old

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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Charlie morgans a pussy EDEN HAZARDS A TANK

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Why i'm breathing? I don't want die.

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What rhymes with 'stick' and is brown? A stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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