What's green and has wheels? A snow flake. I lied about the wheels, and the color.

-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? -Dog shit.

A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

What word does almost everyone spell wrong? Wrong.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at rhyming Refridgerator

if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

Why were there teeth marks in the guys arm? He bit himself

a

Im going to france... Why To get french fries! Have fun Im back with a $10000bill to pay Wheres the fries Shit

I don't always finish my sentences but when I do...

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

involved parents.

What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

[] i have read and agree to the terms of service Nope

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

what did the lawyer say to the doctor? hello.

This is "Eliza" holy shit! I almost gave up and went to a party assuming you guys had simply skipped the reply. Please tell me nothing of this is written in code, because I have no fucking idea how to decipher it... ...To think that so few consider Nero a hero for all that he has done, and so many have come to hate him and still follow his advice basically abusing him. I told my sister to use mom`s cellphone to call and warn as many as possible, telling them to spread the word, is Nero7 Going to make it? He mentioned a barfight starting over nothing during new years eve. I know that some of the members where planning to use his own teachings in order to overthrow him, I warned him but he was fully aware already but did nothing for some reason. Yet none of them have the assets to do anything like this... Should I start calling all those members that left during Nero7`s "sudden paranoia period?" Many of them have political authority and can be of help if we can somehow convince them. Respond Asap, and if Nero7 is in a public hospital, then get him the hell out of there, he is an exposed target for anyone, if he gets killed, ill fucking kill you you hear me!

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

osama bin ladens hiding spot

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Becasue she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

You should never talk to strangers.

how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

guess what what? nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...