Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

Q:Why couldn't the baby walk down the hall way? A: It had a javelin stuck in its head.

Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

knock knock

A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

Why was the man so unhappy. he died

Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw a fridge at it

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

what do you get if you cross a cat with a cat? kittens.

What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder of a 7 year old child.

Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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