How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

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Yo momma is so fat that you should really take her to the hospital, i've become very concerned for her.

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Why was little Johnny sad? His parents were killed in an awful fire

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than that? Dying. What's worse than dying? Finding three worms in your apple.

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What is black, white, and red, and can't turn around in a hallway? A nun with a spear through her head.

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

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A black man, a jew and a racist walk into a bar, The racist proceeds to be a racist

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How do you stop a pedophile from following you? Throw a fridge at him

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

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What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, your tits are nice

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Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

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Do you like fishsticks? If so you are not a homosexual fish as fishsticks are a frozen food rather than fish genitalia.

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Hey, name is Anita, I am Nero`s nurse, he told me to say that if you wish to speak any further, you are going to have to call him and prove you are not some guy. Say Tifa, do you ever play videogames?

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what do you call a guy with a huge dick ? hugedickasorus

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why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

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what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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What's worse then AIDS? Chad Wolbert

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Why was the dog barking? No idea.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pizza. Pizza who? Delivery.

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Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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