look left now look right. washing machine

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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Why did the small child fall off a cliff? Because it was stupid

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how many jews did hitler kill during the holocaust? too many jews

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When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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How did the blond die? Substance abuse

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How did the happy clown die? Testicular Cancer.

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Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

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Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

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So there is 10 Nazis and a monkey the rest doesn't matter but i farted...

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A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

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In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

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abcdHIV this disease is killing me

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What do you call a mexican without a lawn mower? .....unemployed

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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A horse walks into a glue factory..

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What is 69? A two digit number.

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Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

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Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not a very good poet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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