God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

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What do you do when a girl you gave roofies to wakes up? Take your tongue out of her ass and run!

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How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

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What happened to the little kid sitting next to a fat kid ? The little kid got DEVOURED

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A man with Tourettes walks into his Daughter's kindergarten classroom. Fortunately, he was able to control himself and refrain from any outbursts of profanity during the visit.

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Roses are red Violets are blue And so does your mom…

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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"And i look to myself what the hell happened to our world..."

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hi

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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What does a man like. food.

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Q: why do the Toronto maple leafs suck? A: they dont they r in seventh place biotch!

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What do you call a man with no eyes or ears? - Deaf and Blind.

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How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

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Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

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You know what they say about big feet... big penis.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

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What did the frog say Magican? Ribbet.

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I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

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N****R = nice israeli girl great education rich

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

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Whats black and white and red all over? An interracial aborted fetus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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