Q: A black person and a white person decided to have a race, who won? A: The black person, as he exercised and worked out on a regular basis, making him very fast.

why is 5 afraid of 6? it isnt

What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cats dont talk.

Why were corners made? For crying.

When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I think I may be colorblind.

Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch? Names

Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

What do u say to a blond when she says what a name. i love u baby i hate u baby.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

Womens rights.

How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

¿Por qué seis de los siete miedo? ¡Porque siete ocho nueve!

yesterday i saw a man walking down the street with no legs. just kidding.

What do you call 3 horses in 1 boat, in the middle of the Dead Sea? Lost

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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