Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

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What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

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A muslim in Iraq was sniped in the head by US forces. He was a terrorist, who killed 18 innocent people.

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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What did one jew say to the other jew? Want some pizza?

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whats the diffrences between black people and a tire nothin

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophob? a blowjob

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not?

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When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

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What do u call a cripple Biv

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What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

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Q: how do you fit 100 jews in a car A: 3 in the back one in the passenger seat and 96 in the ash tray

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What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

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Why are Pirates called Pirates? Because the word originates from the term Pirata which means 'sea attacker' in Latin.

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Sixty... eight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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