If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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The trick to making a good anti joke is having anticlimactic ending.

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When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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Q:what do you do when a black guy is drowning A:you dont

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A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

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Why was the boy adopted........ because hes grandad

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

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Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

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What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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Knock knock Who's there. Interrupting cow, sorry you can see where this is going, just let me in without asking any more questions please.

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In my opinion I am superior to you all in every single way,an opinion you might disagree with, but can respect. While on the other hand, I have no reason to respect and even less agree with your inferior opinions at all.

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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Hey man how was the trip to Hiroshima? Great it blew my mind!! And how was Nagasaki ? It was the bomb!!

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Because you touch yourself at night.

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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This is not an anti-joke... A man is walking down a street and see's a small boy crying in an alley. The man walks up to him and asks him "What's wrong little guy?" The boy replies that his family is poor, they just got evicted from there house and his parents decided to kill themselves. The man decides out of guilt to bring the boy home and support him for a few days. Three days later the man see's a note on the couch that says "Thank You..." Signed Jamal. The man sighs and says to himself "Your Welcome." The man walks into his room and see's the boy's body in his closet. He starts hysterically laughing and cries into his pillow for many minutes. When he is done sobbing he asks himself "What could be worst than this?" The man walks to his kitchen asking that question over and over. He reaches into his cabinet and grabs his cereal and pours into his bowl. The boy walks out chuckling and says, "Bye bye..." The man was poisoned and died. Now the boy get's the other cereal out and is about to pour it only to find out it was empty. "Screw the Holocaust this SUCKS!!!!!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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