There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Three men walked into a bar the other one ducked. SI

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a hipster and a steaming pile of shit? Many things.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

boner

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

thumb_up thumb_down -16

if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

TOP KEK

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops