Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

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i had sex.

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Barack Obama.

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

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my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who grants them three wishes. The brunette wishes to go back home. The redhead wishes to go back home too. The blonde misses her friends, so she wishes to go back home too.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

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What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

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Why did Isaac run from his mother? She tried to kill him because God said so. Christianity.

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Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

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Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

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How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

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Once a upon a time there was a boy whom likes cheese. The boy: I like Cheese and thats the end of the story

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What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

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I am dyslexic

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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