Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

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life is like a box of chocolates........no it's not

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What do u call a bunch of black dudes burried from their necks down? Afro-turf

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

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How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

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What do you give hobos? Febreeze

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Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

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What´s Green and turns Red at your Finger Tips? Frog in a Blender.

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Who is John Galt?

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible.

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Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

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Roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry show me your tits!!

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whats purple, extinct, and smells like children? barney

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Q: Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air? A: She missed.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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whats hairy and crys your mom

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

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Why couldn't little Suzie snap her fingers? Her stepfather cut off her fingers after becoming a drunk and leaving her family.

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What do you call a man who has reached the highest level of prestige in all Call of Duty games? A Virgin

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Vagina cream... end of story

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Q-how many dead babies does it take to paint your geradge door? A-one if you throw it hard enough

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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