What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

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I heard you like getting dirty, so I got a dump truck to dump dirt on your bed so you can get dirty while you get dirty.

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you just read an anti-joke

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a gay bar. They are closet homosexuals and are searching for partners to engage in consensual sexual intercourse with.

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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a mexican, a asian and a black guy are in a car whos driving? your mom

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What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

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Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

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Why did the baby stop laughing? Would you if you pooped your pants?

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A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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