What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

Hey, do you want to play the rape game ? NO! That's the spirit

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Plumber, ma'am." "Thank God you're here. I haven't been able to take a shower in three days."

ew. I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on earth! ...that's what she said!

Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

So i broke up with my girl, here her number... SIKE!! ITS THE WRONG NUMBAHHH!!!

Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

What's worse than knowing you have Hepititis C? Not knowing.

how many Amish men does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the likelihood of an Amish man needing to change a lightbulb is very slim.

Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

why was the little boy brutally murdered? there was a serial killer in his town.

what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

what happens when you throw a rock in the water? it gets wet

A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

Yup, I 100% agree with all the jokes that were made below this post. Chad's pretty gay.

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yeyeyeyeye live action

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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