Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

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Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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U know whats worser than having a worm in your apple... Having 1352 dislikes on your anti-joke...

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What did the korean guy order at the deli? A sandwich

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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Whats worse than one beast thing? Two beast things. Whats worse than two beast things? The holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust? Three beast things.

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what do you call a small midget? a smidget.

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Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

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Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

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Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

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how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

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Why didn't Jenny's mom give her any Christmas presents? She was a selfish, mean, woman and didn't care about her children.

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I like to thumb up my own jokes.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has no arms.

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Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

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Why did the girl have an abortion? Because she wanted a burger.

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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What do you call a cheese that's not yours? Cheese

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What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

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How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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