What did squidward do when SpongeBob asked him to be his friend on Facebook? 1.declined it 2.got a restraining order against him 3.wondered how computer generated cartoon characters could send and decline friend requests

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? To see outer space

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Future last words Guess who edition: "This new prototype Ferrari XZ handles like a God even at full speed!...Well, if God had no brakes and his turning ability suddenly disappeared when going at over 300 kilometers per hour that is..." "Uh oh now! Another heart attack! Where is mah medical weed? SHAAAAAROOOOOOON!" "Please haters, lower your guns, I will stop singing! Beliebe me!" Moral: "OMG I AM ONLY THE SIXTH MOST USELESS THING NOW!" "MY BODY IS NOT READY! Urgh mah chest... CHAROOOOOOON!

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A man breaks into your house points a gun at your head and proceeds to fire a blank... The man stares at your for another minute before jumping back out of the window he crawled in from and sitting on the curb outside your house rethinking his life choices.

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Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into a worm and finding an apple in it.

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Aodhan, Kevin, Taggart and Caoimhin walk into a bar. They have drinks and then leave.

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how many tentacles did the mentally retarded octopus have? answer: 8!

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Q: Why are all black people fast? A: Because the slow ones are in jail.

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What is brown, creamy, and tastes like gravy? gravy.

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Whats Black and White and Red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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FUCK THE JEWS

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hey i just met you.. and this is crazy. but here my facebook so add me maybe!!

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Who loves George Clooney? George Clooney

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A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

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What's five times 10? Sixty, you retarded fuck.

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What's worse than a paper-cut? Two paper-cuts. What's worse than two paper-cuts? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three paper-cuts.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with a road? To get to the other side.

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One time i was in north philly and bought milk, then i came home and drank it.

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What did the black kid get for christmas?? Your tv

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Why didn't Katie cross the road? Because she's dead.

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smell the vitamin C

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Moral

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How do you suppress a black hole? Surround it with white holes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops