What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Nothing because he got knocked out because he was running too fast and hit his head.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

A lion walks in to a bar, and murders everyone inside. This is why animals are not aloud in bars.

Why did the man commit suicide? Because all meaning in his life were gone.

- What is worse than a baby in a trash bin ? - A baby in five trash bins.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

You come across a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. Why are you telling a joke? Go make sex.

noah is a scrub jungle

What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

What's brown, smells like shit, and are annoying as hell? Taking shits

Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

A blond and his wife were in the hospital expecting their first child together. The wife gives birth to twins and the husband turns to her and says, "I can't believe we had twins. I'm so happy!"

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Peas

what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

Why was the black man in the hotel so upset? I shit on his chest.

Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

knock knock whos there rock rock who rocks dont knock stupid

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee and a 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, “You must be single.” The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict’s intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said “Well, you know what, you’re absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?” The drunk replied, “Cause you’re ugly.”

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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