What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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What do you get when you cross the color pink and pie? A penis ate the answer.

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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What did Helen Keller say to her mother? Nothing coherent.

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My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

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A skeleton walks into a bar. He orders a beer and a mop.

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Roses are black, Violets are black Everything is black I can't see

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A black man confronts a small white man on the sidewalk and asks for money. The white man responded "no".

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What do you say to a black couple that just got married? Congratulations

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How did the Muslim blow up? He accidentally left his gas on and after a while sparked up a cigarette.

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Leo! Leo get over here before i abuse you. Okay, im going to my whip.

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Why did the airplane crash into the ocean? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call man who travels on foot? a pedestrian

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A man rode into town on friday and left on friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a week

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If you are reading this you will soon suffer a slow and painful blow job... -_-

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Why can't Amy winehouse drive? She's dead.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

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Why did everyone at school think that Susan was so hot? They set her on fire.

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How do you make Barack Obama upset? Stab him.

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, was he? No, because he had cancer.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "It sure is hot in here." The other muffin says "Holy shit a talking muffin

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An Italian, a Mexican, and an American all stand in one room. The Italian throws pasta out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country." The Mexican throws a taco out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country." The American throws a burger out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. | | + | + + + + Why did the chicken get run over the farmers tractor? Because the chicken crossed the road and didn't look both ways before crossing and didn't see the tractor that ran him over. P.S. The chicken died and the farmer was arrested for animal abuse.

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An airplane's engine suddenly blows up in the middle of its flight. The pilot turns around and sees a blonde and a brunette. He turns to his right and sees only two parachutes. The pilot says "Ok guys, only two-" Then the plane blows up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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