You attend a school atop a hill in the middle of the town. A river flows east of the hill, under the bridge built for the highway that runs two miles behind the school. You mother leaves for work at 6:00 a.m., and your brother leaves at 9:00 a.m. Schools starts at 7:30 a.m., and you have to pick up a sandwich on the way, for lunch. Also, you forgot to do an assignment that's due today, and it'll take you at least thirty minutes to complete it. How do you get to school on time? You walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There are 2 carrots sitting in a basket. One carrot says to the other; I'm a carrot! The other carrot does not reply, because carrots do not speak. Now consider the possibility, that the first carrot was a talking monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do u make a hockey player cry You Kill his entire family

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The Sun is vital to our human existence on the Earth. It also causes cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red Babies cry Get in my bed Or you will dies

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why is 6 scared of 7 because 7 is scary...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats red and smells like blue paint? blue paint on the rag

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did the Chinese man fail the driving test because he had no previous driving experience and wasn't prepared for the test

thumb_up thumb_down -9

http://i.imgur.com/BJsbT.jpg

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why couldn't the women cook for her family She had no arms, therefore incapable of preforming the task.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Bend over Touch your toes I'll show you where The monster goes

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats worse than one beast thing? Two beast things. Whats worse than two beast things? The holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust? Three beast things.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call seven pine trees and a roll of toilet paper? Mongoloid.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock, Knock Who's there? Anti-Joke Delivery Service. Oh, just leave it by the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock. Whos there? I am the danger! Danger who? I AM THE ONE WHO KNOCKS!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

In Soviet Russia, life was very hard due to the failing economy and oppressive government.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's black and white and red all over? A dying zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

BIG PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a jew walks out of a furnace

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops