What do you call a lubia chin jew slave?

how do you kill chuck norris. you don't

What did the elephant say to the poacher? Answer: Dear God in heaven, please don't kill me for my ivory.

What's sadder then a dead puppy? 2 dead puppies.

(joker) Do you like fishsticks? (recipient) "No" (any response from the joker at this point qualifies as anti joke)

What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, and only one eye? Dave.

Why couldn't the rich dumbass get into colledge? He couldn't open the door

-Children! Come inside! -Why? -We are going out...

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Some people like melon and others like soup.

Why don't bats have penises? They do. I tried. Menstruation.

A Mexican walked into a bar. He never came back out.

Knock Knock. Whose there? The Police, you wife died in a car accident.

Knock Knock ! Who's there? Jim. Oh come in.

Roses are red , Violets Are Blue , i Dont Like rhyming , TITTIES !!

Why Russians ride bears? Because god hate bears

Why did the chicken cross the road? ....Because based on modern mathematics the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

-Ask me if I'm a tree. +Are you a tree? -Yes. -Ask me if I'm an orange. +Are you an orange? -No, I'm a tree, were you listening me?

Why couldn't the bird fly? cause it was a penguin

There are two types of people in the world: 1. people who can extrapolate from incomplete data And I have two wonderful pieces of advice: 1. Never tell anyone everything you know

What's the difference between 15 dead babies and a cadilac? I don't have a cadilac.

What do you call a city that never sleeps? Cities cannot sleep; they merely represent a societal body of people living in a confined community. A city may have a prosperous night-life, however, cannot functionally "fall asleep" in the convential sense of the term.

how do you kill a rat skin it and feed it to your child and wait till it shits then when it shits feed it to your dog then when it shits then microwave it and shove the smelly liquid remains up your ass.

Whats the difference between a truck full of dead babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't pick up the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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