Neil is a reterd.

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How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea lives for around 5 minutes in hot water.

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brittney griner

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These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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What did the dying mother give her newborn child? AIDS

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What is similar to an orange?? A tangerine.

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What did the cashier say to the blonde? That will be $5.39, would you like a receipt?

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Why do women live longer? Once they're sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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no pun intended

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Did you hear about the cannibal who ate the Olympic record sprinter? He's in prison for first-degree murder & crimes against humanity.

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Your mother is so classy, when I asked her to order at a fast food drive through she decided to park the car a eat inside.

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what did the tree say when it fell down? Nothing it is humanly impossible for a tree to talk. Especially after it fell down. I mean that would hurt.

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What's long, brown, and runs across a family's backward? A fence.

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Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

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Q: What's that white, sticky stuff on your mom? A: Glue

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4 gay guys walk into a bar but there is only one bar stool, where do they sit? They go to a different bar

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Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

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Q: Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? A: Neither did he.

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How do u make a hockey player cry You Kill his entire family

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When life gives you carrots, don't make carrot juice, because it's gross.

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What do you call a Mexican playing basketball? A man of hispanic heritage that enjoys the sport of basketball.

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A bear walks into a bar. Animal control was contacted and the bar was evacuated.

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What Do You Call The White House When Obama Is President? What? The White House.

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I couldnt remember who Rhiana used to date. Then it hit me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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