Why did the carrot jumped over the fence? It didn't. Carrots do not have the physical ability to jump.

When life gives you lemons, you make grape juice and let the world wonder how you made it.

Where would you be unlikely to find a polar bear? In a courtroom.

Have you ever seen a dinosaur? No

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms

A girl accidentally clicks on an advertisement while on anti-jokes.com, the girl silently curses and quickly presses the back button.

what is the difference between a boy scout and a jew? boy scouts come back from camp.

i'm hard

The lion swallowed his pride.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

you better accept "balls in yo mouf"...

Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

There were two men 1 says "hey stupid" and the other man says "Yeah"

What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

What do you call a man with a fork stuck in his head? A man with a fork stuck in his head

Your momma is so black, that her melanin levels are relatively high.

What looks like poo but is rainbow colored? Rainbow colored poo.

What is funnier than 24? 25! hahahahahaha!

A slutty deer walks into a bar she then comes out and says wow i cant believe i blew 30 bucks

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

What did the Holocaust survivor say when asked about their memories in the deathcamps? A: I'd rather not think about it.

A white man, a black man, and a mexican are stranded on an island. They all died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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