what did the scene kid get for christmas? a gift card which he used ironically.

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A squirrel runs into a bar and out-runs the bartender to get some assorted nuts on the table then runs out of the bar

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What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend?

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Why did Sally fall of the swing set? Because she got hit with a mattress

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How many babiess it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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An epileptic man attends a rave.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor dog

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What did the grape say to the bannana? Nothing.

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Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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One cow, determined to make a difference in the world, gets killed in a meat packing plant. We killed him, and we killed his dreams.

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? Throw a jar of foreskin at it.

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How do you make Barack Obama upset? Stab him.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why don't elderly people act their age? because they die.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met you

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What do you call two gay black men in one sleeping bag? There names

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

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So a deaf man is listening to the radio.

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What did the DJ play at the disco? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill? Confused, mind bruised, it seeps out It seeps out, it seeps out Face down, home town looks so grey Looks so grey, looks so grey Convexed you bend, twist and shout Twist and shout, twist and shout Stand up brush off get moving Get moving, get moving What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? (x4) Face down, home town, face down, home town Face down, home town, it looks so grey (x4) What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? (x4) More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmania.com/monster_lyrics_automatic_the.html All about Automatic The: http://www.musictory.com/music/Automatic+The

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spell backwards: taco cat

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what does hi = good by cause person doesn't like you.

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there is a blonde, red head, and brunet held captive in afghanistan. The people say whats your last word to the red head, she says tornado... they turned and she escaped, they say to the brunet what is your last word, she says tsunami.. they turn and she escaped. They go to the blonde and say what is your last word, she says fire... she is then shot rapidly and she dies.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had three balls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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