A blond walks into an electronics store. Then she promptly walks out, as she got the wrong store.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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why did the plane crash the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why was the priest lying still? Because his son shot him

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Why did the Monkey Fall out of the tree? ..It was dead..

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knock knock who's there? it's I, your son. ....... what? dad let me in, it's cold! i don't have a son.... but.... i love you... get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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An overzealous adventurer takes a trip to the Congo in Central Africa. While exploring the dense jungles, he accidentally drinks water that is contaminated with a very rare virus. He lives through the pain of the virus for many years. About 10 years after his trip to Africa, researchers discover a cure for the adventurer's virus. He goes to the clinic to get his shot to kill the virus. Exhilarated, the now cured adventurer runs out of the clinic but fails to look both ways while crossing the street and gets hit by and ambulance and dies.

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Why was Uncle Monty's head damn tasty? Because he shoved it up a horses arse when it needed a shit.

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amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

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what do get when you throw a penny in between a jew and a mexican? nothing besides one less penny

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Why did the chicken loom the road? To unlock the final boss.

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What's the main difference between dogs and children? When children reach their teen years they grow up and leave home. When dogs reach their teen years they die of old age.

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why did the the frog cross the road? because he was on the chickens back

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PSP... Is a cat... you can throw against the wall.

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How does a black man cut his hair? At a hairdresser

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what do a carrot and an elephant have in common? theyre both orange except for the elephant.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have outsimers Wait what?

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Ed Milliband looks like an amphibian.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pickles.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

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Women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops