A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we've got a drink named after you!". The grasshopper turns and says "You've got a drink named Steve?"

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How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

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People say the sky's the limit................................ but there's footprints on the moon.

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How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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Why are pigs smelly ? Because a cucumber can't walk.

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Why did the man reach for his gun? Because he wanted to kill someone.

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What stands on the corner oof every major city at night? A cop

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Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

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I AM SATAN, YOU SHALL LOVE ME BEFORE EVERYBODY ELSE! YOU SHALL STONE THY INSOLENT CHILDREN! THY SHALL R*PE AND KILL IN MY NAME! YOU SHALL HANG MY SON ON THE CROSS WHICH I SACRIFICED BECAUSE HE IS IMMORTAL/BECAUSE I LOVE YOU? "Moral" "Man": Joke is on you, who do you think I am, God?

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Why does Nathan Rogers never get any pussy? Because goblins have small dicks

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Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

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What do you get when you put a black guy in a blender. Why are you still reading....

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How many fat Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why was the young women crying Because her fiancé who was battling a severe Case of pneumonia just passed away

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

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It's April Fool's Day and a little boy runs up to his mom. "Daddy hung himself! He's in the attic!" The mom runs up to the attic, but the dad's not there. The boy looks at his mom and says, "April fools! He's in the basement!"

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Anti-Joke is a silver bullet.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms

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every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute goes by.

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What do you call a man with an Eye patch and no arms? Names.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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