Derp

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, 200 l.b.s

Person 1: Can I ask you a question? Person 2: You just did.

what did the pizza say to the bread? nothing pizza cant talk

Why did the deaf man attend the music concert? He was invited by friends and wasn't doing anyhting else that evening.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

Q: Why can't a tomato fly a plane? A: Cuz it's a tomato

Q. What happened first The Tree or The Apple. A. Johny Appleseed.

The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

The only time when white and black are together When I've just taken a shit! ?ttis

A cat ran into the road...I hit it

Boyfriend: Why are you so negative all the time? Girlfriend: I'm not! I'm positive! Boyfriend: No your not your arguing with me right now and you... Narrator: The girl takes the pregnancy test and shoves it in the guys mouth kicks him in the nuts and runs out the door.

have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he....

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...