Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBO... nope bin laden

What happens if an unmovable object gets hit by an unstoppable force? To get to the other side.

What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

I used to be an adventurer like you...but then I was diagnosed with cancer.

A planes crashes on the US-Canada border. The survivors are promptly taken to a hospital nearby to be treated for their injuries.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was playing Pokemon Go.

Why aren't 4 black people driving a red mustang? They can't afford it.

How do you make a fireman cry??? Kill His Family

Wanna hear a joke? Justin bieber

What's the difference between vanilla ice cream and vanilla ice cream with chocolate chips? Neither one has vanilla ice cream in it except for both of them.

HEY YOU!!!!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people, and are a nation and ethnoreligious group originating in the Israelites or Hebrews of the Ancient Near East. A pizza on the other hand is an Italian dish made up of cheese, bread sauces and multiple toppings.

A black guy, a Latino guy and an Asian guy all walk in a bar. What do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

A baby seal walks into a club

Yo mama is so stupid that she is currently taking courses in a community college to get her degree in business so she can have a well-paying job.

What's fat and ginger? My dog.

I got shot once it hurt a lot

How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

What is brown and has 15 legs? (They answer "What?") Reply: I don't know I was hoping you would.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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