What's worse than finding a fly in your drink? Gonorrhea.

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A guy orders soup at the resturant and says to the waiter, "will you try this soup?" The waiter says "what is it too hot?" the guy says "just try the soup." the waiter asks "Is it too cold?" the guy sais just try the soup." the waiter says "fine, where's the spoon?" AHAHHH!!!

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what has 50 legs, but can't walk? half of a centipede

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A black man walks into an abbatoir.

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Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

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Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

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What did the vegitarian order for dinner? Vegatables

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Scenario: Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub The first one says, "Hey, can you pass the radio please" And the second one replies, "Sorry, my cousins are made of soap."

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Some people like melon and others like soup.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who`s there? Not Suzie

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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A buissnes man walks into a meeting and says hello i'm a buissnesman

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What did the firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire? -Let's go home

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A player under the tag "KiTcHeNGuRLxGaMerZ143" got a message after finishing a map on call of duty. "lol ur good."

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Farmers are outstanding in their fields

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says why the long face. The horse, unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

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Women's Rights.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

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maths is annoying!!! LIKE if you agree!!!!! :D

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Why does Courtney smell? she has a severe lack of personal hygiene which needs addressing,

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what do kallum and joel have in common they both work at club getaway

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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