A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

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Q why did the kids make fun of timmy A because he was an android with al chunk of metal added accidentally where a real boys crotch would be. Bwilkster

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Except it's not usually a rectangular or love heart shaped... nor does it contain small expensive assorted candy... life may not also contain nuts... or be devoured by our fellow human... Life is not like a box of chocolates

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Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

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So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? A fat kid sitting on you

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how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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Why did the plane crash? The Pilot Wash a Loaf of Bread

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops