Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

hey guys im gay

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

haha

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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