Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

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Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Except it's not usually a rectangular or love heart shaped... nor does it contain small expensive assorted candy... life may not also contain nuts... or be devoured by our fellow human... Life is not like a box of chocolates

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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Q why did the kids make fun of timmy A because he was an android with al chunk of metal added accidentally where a real boys crotch would be. Bwilkster

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What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

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Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

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how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? A fat kid sitting on you

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

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Why did the plane crash? The Pilot Wash a Loaf of Bread

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops