Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

What do you call a black guy surrounded by a gang of white guys? I don't know, maybe if you asked him his name you would find out.

Do you know why this joke isn't funny. It's punchline is bad.

A jew walks into a bar and asked for 5 shots the bartender replies to him "did you and your wife have a fight" "yeah now shes atheist"

Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting a needle shoved into your penis and the needle hitting your scrotum so that you are in serious agony for hours and finding out you cannot have kids because of it.

What is blue and roles about on the floor A baby playing with a plastic sack

How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

Why did the chicken cross the road? An even better question is why are the chicken morals being questioned every time it feels like doing something.

a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

I hate it when people dont finish there sen

There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

If I had a penny for every time I said the word "the" I would have AIDS

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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