johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

What did the sailor say to the shore? Ur a beach!

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

What do you call a guy eating a sandwich? Whatever his name is.

Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

Women deserve equal rights.

Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

I was having sex with thisgirl and now I'm going to be a dad. All because I didn't wear a condom

What did the sign say? It said slow down

Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

Q: How did the robber steal a laptop from best buy? A: With his hands

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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