Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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How do you say hooker in Chinese? ?

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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Why is Tommy dead? Because he died.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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yolo your orange looks orange

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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What do you call a a chinese abortion? My dinner

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

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I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

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Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

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9/11 my birthday

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Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

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So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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