Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get to the hospital before he lost to much blood from his stab wound.

What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

What did the old man say to the young man? Nothing, the old man was dead.

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

SHUT UP, yes you... WHAT DID I JUST SAY!!!!

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

[Insert anti-joke here]

Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

What does it take to play in the WNBA? Nothing....

Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

Knock Knock [Opens Door]

What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words are merely the smallest element of language capable of containing meaning and isolation and, as such could never directly produce the 4,000 Newtons of force per square centimetre required to break bones.

What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

penisvaginaorgasm

knock, knock! who's there? i don't know i don't know who niether do i...

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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