Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't 6 like 7? Because 7 was a huge racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

My mother always said that jumping in piles of leaves was fun. That was before she died of pancreatic cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A comedian walks onto the stage. Antehumor.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I'm gay Mr Goodwin

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Mack: Hello Jonathan: Hi Mack: My name is Mack, what's your name? Jonathan: My name is Billy Mack: You liar! I'm reading this post at anti-joke.com and whenever you reply, your name shows Johnathan! Johnathan: Well Mack, I guess you broke the 4th wall. By the way, this joke is over in 3, 2, 1...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Excuse me, do you have any gnats? Yes, plenty. Thank you

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man is traveling to the nearest grocery store. He stops at an intersection and notices a another car beside him. It was a black corvet. So he blew it up and the men inside of it as well. He then proceeded to call the cops as to try to cover the explosion up as if it was not his fault. Unfortunately, the police had video evidence of the incident through video surveillance and the man was arrested for life. He never got a second chance in life and eventually died a slow, painful death in the hands of cancer at the age of 91.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the fish look like a human? Because it was a person, drowning.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the Nazi doctor drown a Jew in the lake? Because he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops