What's the difference between cat and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other is a watermelon.

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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Q:What is usually pink, brown or black, usually big and comes out smaller, which goes in and out of your mothers mouth? A: Could be lots of things really... Moral: But we all know what you imagined you sick bastard!

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What's Great and Danish? The Great Dane Kane.

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A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

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What is a Zebra? Zebras (/?z?br?/ zeb-r? or /?zi?br?/ zee-br?)[1] are several species of African equids (horse family) united by their distinctive black and white stripes. Their stripes come in different patterns, unique to each individual. They are generally social animals that live in small harems to large herds. Unlike their closest relatives, horses and donkeys, zebras have never been truly domesticated.

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Me: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? You: No. Me: Neither have they.

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What's plastic and kids turn it on... A xbox.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

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Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

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Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

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What does a jew to enter in a movie theater? He buys a ticket!

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Why did the Mexican jump the border? Because his mom told him the grass was always greener on the other side... She lied.

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My friend thinks he's smart, He said that onions are the only food that make you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

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What did the two Japanese men say to each other? I have no idea I don't speak Japanese

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Why couldn't Jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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Why did the black homosexual blind man want to go to the comedy club? He enjoys a good laugh

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

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Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops