Knock knock? Who's there? Herpes. Bummer.

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

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Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

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whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

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What's black and yellow and flies? I dont know.

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

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Why is Obama Care a lie? Cuz he doesn't care!

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Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

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yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

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Why was the black man sad? Because his wife and children had been killed in a freak car accident while he had been driving.

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How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

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Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

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josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

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Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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Q:Whats not funny? A: Antijokes

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

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What has two legs and can't walk. Someone thats paralyzed!

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Arab 1: Du good bai me, and I'll du good bai you. Arab 2: Ye men, sounds good men. Arab 3: O man, no way. Arab 4: K, u wait...jus wait n see.. Arab 5: I no interest! Me so saudi! Arab 6: D'oh...ha, ha, haa! Arab 7: This is so bahrain...I'm going to go club some protesters.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

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What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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